Lately It's All About You

I seldom wish for things to fade
But I make this wish today
To rid me of the dreams of you
And memories of what we've been through.

Goodbye to Hello

I feel...crummy. I don't know why, I guess just everything is sinking in too fast for me. I'm leaving my home to go to another city all on my own. That might sound like sissy whining, but to be honest, I didn't leave home much as a kid. My parents lost a child through a miscarriage before me, so once I was born I was pretty much always in their sights. I'm independent to the extent that I can be. I just won't get used to how loud the outside world is. But I'm so ready for university.

Oh but here's the kicker.

I'm going to the same university as my ex.

Not smart. To this day I still wonder what was going on through my mind when I clicked accept. I mean I had so many other options. So many better options, but I guess I just didn't want to stay home.

Then again, this university has been my dream place since grade 11. Wait. I guess that doesn't help my case. I meant grade 11 way before I met her.

We see each other now and don't say anything to each other. Just awkward smiles and wave. She says it's cause she doesn't notice. I guess I'm pretty unnoticeable.

Wow I feel like shit. I just can't wait til this feeling finally washes over. Cheers.

-------

VERSE 1:
You say I only hear what I want to
Tell me that I only really need you
But please don’t go and change my mind
I’ll hold your hand, this one last time
I’m holding on but let’s just say goodbye
[But baby please just one last try]

VERSE 2:
[I see you come and go
To say goodbye to hello]
As you walk down this aisle with a halo~
Don’t say you won’t find someone like me
When you’re walking beside someone from your team
Though you always said that I was too easy
Cause after all it’s still hard to breathe
Don’t say that I’m better off without you
After everything that we’ve been through
I still see it, still believe it

CHORUS:
One – last – time
I’m saying goodbye
[I’m saying, I’m saying]
Goodbye to hello, Goodbye to hello, Goodbye to hello

VERSE 3:
I slow my footsteps as I hear you speak
Wondering if you still have everything you took from me
I walk behind you but I turn left and take a seat
Cause your gaze is the one I’m afraid to meet
You stand beside him before a priest
As you tell lies right through your teeth [I’ll always love you]
Telling him you love him to put his mind at ease
As he puts a ring that freaking gleams
Cause that’s exactly what you did to me
I still see it, can’t believe it!

CHORUS:
One – last – time
I’m saying goodbye
[I’m saying, I’m saying]
Goodbye to hello, Goodbye to hello, Goodbye to hello
One – last – time
I’m saying goodbye
[I’m saying, I’m saying]
Goodbye to hello, Goodbye to hello, Goodbye to hello

How Can I Forget

Song used for effect: Love Drunk – Boys like Girls [in italics, quotations and/or square brackets]

“Top down in the summer sun
The day we met was like a hit and run
And I still taste it on my tongue”

Sometime I still remember
We’re no longer together
And memories of our first kiss
Slowly drifts into my mind

“The sky was burning up like fireworks
You made me want you, oh, so bad it hurt
But girl, in case you haven't heard”

Sometime I still remember
The times when we’re together
And I thought the love that we shared
Would last forever

“Hot sweat and blurry eyes
We're spinning on a roller coaster ride
The world stuck in black and white”

But what can I say
I’m just a kid today
How can I wake –
From this dream
Of you.
Something I can’t do –

“You drove me crazy every time we touched
Now I'm so broken that I can't get up
Oh girl, you make me such a lush”

I turned around to look at you [All the time I wasted on you]
After playing with your calculator [All the bullshit you put me through]
As you did your calculus [I'm checking into rehab 'cause everything that we had]
To find you looking at me [Didn't mean a thing to you~]
Expectantly
And I didn’t know what to do [I used to be love drunk, but now I'm hung over]
Then it happened [I love you forever, but now I'm sober]
I kissed you
My eyes opened in shock, [I used to be love drunk, but now I'm hung over]
Confused [I love you forever, forever is over]
As to [We used to kiss all night, now it's just a bar fight]
How I found [So don't call me crying, say hello then goodbye]
Someone like you. [Oh yeah!]

So much trouble sleeping at night
I’m starting to grow weary
And tired of this fight
That I keep putting up
To keep my mind right
But when the end is near
It’s the end of my sight.

"Cause I used to be love drunk...but now I'm hung over
I love you forever...but now I'm sober."

Lately I Keep Dreaming of You

Was everything make-believe
The truth that I didn’t see
I wish we could play pretend
And not have things to end.

Just like before
When it was you and me
I didn’t have to walk out this door
Alone, going crazy –

Can we play pretend
That things don’t have to end
And it’s you and me
Cause baby,
I miss you so much.

Steps

I count the steps – down this country road
I’m starting to forget, all that I have known
But I’m thinking that I can be fine
As the time slowly slips on by

Though I know a lot of your foreign woes
I had wished for you not to go
Cause it’s been a good while
Since I’ve seen your smile
How I missed it so–oh

And now I’m standing out here alone
I am lost, not knowing where to go
Woah~
I stand here alone, outside your door
I knew I had wanted to be yours
From the day I had met you

Cause everything you have said
All the words swimming in my head
Had been the truth
How I wished for you
Woah~

I listen to the night skies
Asking favours of them
Asking them, if you are fine
As this feeling just overwhelms
And I know that someday I’ll be fine
As the time slowly slips on by
Even the days that you aren’t mine

A.B.L.E.

I walk by and a gentle breeze
Carries my eyes and they see
Into the past
Where petals slowly drift down as I recall
Back when I first met her, in the brisk fall
How her skirt swirls as she spins
How her dress sways in the wind
And the giggles
The laughter
The words ever after
Never more heard

I close my eyes and recall
How, on first thought,
She was like a porcelain doll
And her closet of shoes
Each one begging to
Contain her cute little feet
As she dances down the streets
To places unknown

No wait
Scratch that
Must have been jeans
And a tank top
The one calling all the shots
In court
Bring down her gavel
As I shout objection

No, no, wait
That’s not how it goes.

Her warm chocolatey eyes
As they look into mine
The way her smile twinkles
As if trying to hold in
The funniest news ever heard

So confused.
So conflicted.
Who the fuck are you talking about?

I would have let you leave

Inspired by Katie Herzig's line, "I would've let you leave" in Static Waves. Amazing song.
Some parts probably sound familiar, probably cause I've had this awesome song on loop.

--

Doesn’t matter if I didn’t want to
I would have let you leave
But do tell me
Of your foreign victories
When we’re miles apart
In distance and the heart

I trace the steps
To the day
Where we parted
Cause I count the steps
From where I am
And where we started

I know you’ll never understand
But try to follow with me
If you can

If you can try
I wouldn’t mind
I want to tell you
I wished you mine

Cause here I stand
Even if it’s just sentimentally
I would have let you leave
Here’s the key that I still hold faithfully

I held your hand
When mine were shaking
I kissed your lips
When they were quivering

But now you need
Someone to be
Something better than me
I would have let you leave

But I’m begging for you not to leave